Thursday, August 28, 2008

Play by Play of "The Speech"

10: 20
Smile and repeatedly say thank you to the adoring crowd? Check.

10:22
Officially accept the nomination and pause for more chanting? Check.
Soothe the egos of Bill and Hillary by praising them again? Check.

10:25
Obama is doing a fine job so far, but it's hardly his most compelling speech. The repeated applause seems to be holding him back from becoming completely fired up. It's only the beginning though....

10:30
And the gloves are off. Five minutes in, Barack Obama has torn into Mac on one issue and one issue alone: the economy.

10:32
"Let me spell out exactly what that change would mean..." Listen up, all you people convinced the man has never so much as said whether he thinks the Earth is round or flat.

10:33
Tries to turn the energy crisis (an issue McCain managed to find traction on) against the Arizona senator

10:35
Specifics are important, but he's definitely more enthralling when he uses all that 'high-falutin' language.

10:37
By the way, did anyone spot Gray Davis in the audience? Remember, ex-governor of California? Infamous for presiding over massive energy shortage....terminated by Arnold in the '03 election, etc, etc

10:39
Here comes the personal responsibility section. This one's for you, disaffected Republicans.

10:40
Anthony Harris!

10:40
Senator Patrick Leahy in the house! Anyone see his cameo in "The Dark Knight?" He was the old guy in Wayne Manor who stood up to the Joker and ended up-oh, hold on, here's some hard-driving foreign policy

10:42
"Won't even follow [bin Laden] to the cave where he lives." Oh snap!

10:44
Twenty minutes in. It's a solid, meaty speech, but I don't think he's reached the level of his '04 keynote address....or even his "race" speech. Yet.

10:47
There we go! A rift on his "there is not a blue America and a red America" line from '04 brings the house down.

10:48
The A-word. "We may not agree on abortion, but surely we can agree on reducing the number of abortions in this country."

10:49
Just brought the crowd to their feet by declaring that "Kwanza Fisher is awesome!"

10:50
Ok, not really, but he was thinking it. Latest soundbite: "If you don't have a record to run on, then you paint your opponent as someone people have to run from."

10:51
"This election has never been about me. It's about you."

10:51
They should be using this "8 is enough" chant a lot more often. Slap it on a bumper sticker and over a picture of George and Mac embracing.

10:54
Ooh, here comes some thematic language......and the first acknowledgment that today is the 45 year anniversary of MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech.

10:55
"America, we cannot turn back. We cannot walk alone. At this moment, in this election, we must walk forward into the future."

10:56
Ends by quoting scripture. Translation: "Evangelicals, vote Democratic! I'm not a Muslim. Ahem, not that there would be anything wrong with that, of course. And the Republicans won't really pass a federal gay marriage ban, anyway....and I promise, I'm really not the Anti-Christ!"

10:57
Wow. A Southern man (Toby Keith, maybe?) sings an extremely patriotic song as Michelle and those talkative daughters come on stage.

10:59
Barack Obama: "Here's President Biden! I mean, Vice President Biden. No one noticed that right?" Yeah, he really did that: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ET6Cis9utOM

11:00
Don't turn around Joe! We can see your giant bald spot!

11:00
Now they're playing theme music from "Remember the Titans." Really.

11:oo
Or maybe it was "Rudy," or "Hoosiers."

11:00
Can we get some John Williams?

11:02
Nope. Definitely "Remember the Titans."

11:04
I'm very curious about what the pundits will say about his speech.

11:05
Pundits=happy with the specifics.

11:06
A hardcore (ahem, black male) Hillary supporter just knocked on my door, walked in the room, extended his hand and said, "You got me." Job well done, Barack.

11:07
Over on Fox News, Juan Token Williams is giving Brit Hume what he wants, nitpicking the speech.

11:08
William Kristol (uber-neocon responsible for the deaths of just a few hundred thousand Iraqis) actually says that the speech met and exceeded expectations. Those neocons....always surprising you.

11:10
I wish I had MSNBC so that I could see Keith Olbermann and Chris 'Thrill Up My Leg' Matthews swoon over their dear Barack.

11:11
Anonymous Republican woman backs up Token, says the speech is typical liberal Democratic fare. In other news, Brit Hume breathes a sigh of relief.

11:15
If Mac wants to keep Obama from running away with this thing, he'd better run an attack ad with Paris Hilton, Jeremiah Wright, and William Ayers all together. And just for good measure, run another add that takes it even further. Voiceover: "Barack Obama's father was alive at the same time as Adolf Hitler. Barack Obama is just a few years younger than Osama bin Laden. So can we really trust him to lead?" Ah yes, that's the ticket.

11:17
Darth Krauthhamer is speaking after the break? NOOOOOOO!

11:18
Mac announces his VP tomorrow morning. He's big on relationships, so I doubt it'll be Romney. And Mac may be crazy, but he's not suicidal, so Lieberman is out. The smart move would be a woman like Alaska Governor Sarah Palin.....but I'm thinking he went with Governor Tim 'No Jaw' Pawlenty. No, really, look at a picture of the man.

11:21
"The speech wasn't great, but it was exceedingly smart." I'm sorry to say it, but I think Darth Krauthammer hit the nail on the head. Night night everyone.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

this is very useful, edward, as i only have my laptop with me and no tv. thanks for the updates!

kwanza

Ed Mitchell said...

Kwanza!!!!! You're welcome!

Anonymous said...

hahahaha love that "kwanza fisher is awesome" part. i swear im blushing.

keep up the good work haha

Anonymous said...

Edward,
I told you that you would enjoy blogging. This was so fun to read...and so true at the same time. Great perspective + Entertainment + a hint of 'uptight-ness' (yes, i made that word up)=Edward Mitchell
You should really do this more often, I'd definitely read it.
I have a lot of other things to say to you....buuuuuuut they can wait :)

-Randol

Anonymous said...

Okay sir, you are ignoring me on facebook so I'll bring my comments here. First, I would like to say excellent coverage. I hope we can expect more from Ed the pundit in the future. I would like to point out though that Obama actaully said "We may not all agree on abortion but we can all agree on reducing the number of unwanted pregnancies." :Burn: j/k :P That's interesting that McCain picked a female vp, but do you really think it'll help? Although you know I like the NRA bit lol.

Beth